Professionally Unemployable Women's Festival Tank

Good news: your performance review has been completed. There will not be another one.

The Professionally Unemployable Women’s Festival Tank is for artists, freelancers, independent thinkers, and anyone whose personality has been repeatedly determined incompatible with fluorescent lighting, arbitrary authority, and meetings that should have been emails.

Featuring original Unimaginative artwork and the declaration PROFESSIONALLY UNEMPLOYABLE, this tank celebrates the particular set of qualities that make someone excellent at creating things and apparently very concerning to Human Resources.

You’re self-directed.

You ask questions.

You notice when things don’t make sense.

You have ideas about how things could be done better.

And, worst of all, you occasionally say those ideas out loud.

Corporate America regrets to inform you that you are not a culture fit.

Wear it to art festivals, studio sessions, freelance gigs, gallery openings, coffee shops during normal business hours, or anywhere someone might ask when you’re going to get a “real job.”

Preferably while actively doing your real job.

Product details:

• Lightweight 3.5 oz fabric
• 65% polyester / 35% combed ring-spun cotton
• Scoop neckline with hemmed neck and armholes
• Curved hem and side seams for a relaxed, flattering fit
• References available upon absolutely no request
• Benefits package includes creative freedom and financial uncertainty
• Mandatory team-building exercises successfully avoided
• HR has closed the file

PROFESSIONALLY UNEMPLOYABLE
Overqualified for compliance.

See the Professionally Unemployable collection.